Why You’re Not Wearing Your Clothes

I talk to dozens of women every week, from clients and Ageless Style Program members to viewers like you through my free mini Style Sessions, and there’s something I’ve been hearing from more and more of you over the past few months.

• I have so many clothes and I don’t wear any of them.
• I wear the same boring things every day and my beautiful wardrobe just hangs in my closet.
• I buy things that I love but don’t end up wearing. I have so many items with the tags on.

After the millionth time, I started to sense a pattern. :) Women aren’t wearing their clothes, and their wardrobes are broken, but rather than trying to fix it by analyzing what doesn’t work, they buy more clothes, thinking that new stuff will fix the problem. And the cycle continues.

So what do you do if you find yourself with lots of clothes that you’re just not wearing? And what can you do about it? I break it down for you in today’s video.

Here, 5 reasons you may not be wearing your clothes.

Just because you admire an outfit on someone else or save it to a Pinterest board, that doesn’t mean that the outfit will feel like you. You can enjoy the look of something without wanting to wear it. For example, you might have a friend whose bold, colorful style you admire, but when you put it on, it feels off, like you’re wearing someone else’s clothes. Inspiration should always be filtered through you so that it feels authentic.

Sometimes, we shop for the person we want to be, or the person we wish we were, rather than the person we actually are. This can mean pretending you’re the type of woman who wears blazers or lounges around in dresses or thinking that you dress up more than you do. Whether it’s fantasy shopping or simply wishful thinking, shopping for a lifestyle that you don’t live only brings frustration.

Here’s a simple exercise: Choose 3 dress codes/areas of your life (i.e. work, church, date). Name them 1, 2 and 3. Then find 20 items in your closet, and designate a dress code to each. For example, the blazer is 1, for work, while the dress might be 1 and 2, for work and church. If you find item after item that doesn’t work for any of your more common dress codes, then you probably have a lot of clothes that are just not getting worn.

This is an activity I lead all of my Ageless Style Program members through, because it’s so critical. In simplest terms, it’s a love/hate list. But putting all of your preferences, quirks, likes and dislikes in one place can be a revelation. Your list might look something like this:

Like:

• Comfy dresses
• Kitten heels
• Natural fibers
• Pattern
• Midi lengths

Hate:

• Sleeveless
• Fabrics that wrinkle
• Fussy clothes
• Body con
• Maxi dresses

This comes up a lot in my conversations with women who are searching for the current version of their personal style. They see someone with style they admire, and they decide that from now on they are going to be edgy, or preppy, or boho. They go down the rabbit hole of buying items that speak to that style only to later realize that it never felt like them.

When our clothes feel off, we feel it and the people around us feel it. Many of these tips are designed to help you choose clothes that feel like you and not like personas you are putting on. You want them to feel and look like an extension of you.

Do you have lots of clothes that you are not wearing, and do you regularly buy items only to put them in your closet and promptly forget about them? Which of these 5 points hit home with you? Let’s chat in the comments!