I know I can be a LITTLE dramatic. In yesterday’s live video on Facebook, I threw out words like “garish” and “horrifying” with abandon, but that’s because I really really really want you to skip these clothes. Like, really, As your fashion friend, I feel like it’s my job to make sure you’re not wasting your money on these styles, because they are… well, garish and horrifying.
Remember the old Vidal Sassoon ads… “If you don’t look good, we don’t look good.”
You could say the same thing about me as your fashion friend and personal stylist. My job is to help you look your best. And these clothes are going to undo all of your good intentions and immediately derail any attempt to look stylish
Can a single item or outfit really do all that? Yes. Yes it can.
In today’s video, I classify these aging outfits into two categories:
Old Lady Items:
These are items that are only and specifically made for an older market and almost always make us look older.
These are trendy or statement-y items that are past their expiration date, and look aging because they are out of style.
Here, aging and atrocious items that are currently in stores for spring 2023, and why you should avoid them.
The Aging Outfits (& Items!)
These items and outfits are currently available and look instantly aging!
Dress with Jacket
A dress with a matching jacket, where one or both of the items has a print are so dated. Instead, add one of your essentials, whether that’s a bomber or moto or blazer, over your favorite dress.
Dress With Dated Details
Details date. A dress that is out of style and has dated details will instantly age you. The print, stripe down the middle, and metal bar at the top of this dress all make it out of style.
Tears for Tiers
My play on words just makes me so happy lol. Diagonal tears, in either chiffon or raw-edged jersey, are both mature and out of style.
Tiered dresses are actually very trendy right now, but they look very different than the above.
Dress With Overlay
A dress with an attached layer of chiffon is one of the most aging styles you can choose, and it serves no purpose other than adding weight.
Faux Layered Dress
Faux layers are not only not functional, but they’re also frumpy.
Dresses and Tops with Borders
These tops, many of which feature a band at the hem or the neckline with a contrasting print, are out of style.
The CYA Jacket
These little nothing sweaters and boleros exist solely to cover your arms. Sleeves would be so much better. They are even worse if they tie in front or are made of mesh or crochet.
The Sassy Maxi
Jersey maxis in these dated statement prints are no longer in style.
Curved Hem Tops
Curved hems are out of style and also really unflattering, especially for a woman who is curvy in the hips, bum, or thighs. This specific style highlights the crotch, not an area any of us want to draw attention to.
The 3 Piece Evening Set
Often in a mix of chiffon, lace, and light neutral or pastel, these are the most aging option available to you for evening. A definite skip.
The Roll Tab Shirt
These were trendy about ten years ago, but they have been out of style for a long time.
The Handkerchief Hem Tunic
These tunics are not only dated, they are also very unflattering, making you look shorter and wider.
I can’t think of a more aging and less flattering bathing suit style than a tankini with a tunic top in a crazy print.
Swing Tanks & Tees
These tees and tanks are cut in an A-line shape for added movement and volume at the hem, but they are unflattering and very out of style.
The Lattice Trim Top
Another dated detail that is no longer stylish is the lattice trim top, so if these are still hiding in your closet, it’s time to retire them.
Did any of these items surprise you? Do you have any questions about aging outfits? Let me know in the comments!